April 23, 2009

I always love conceptualizing a new story or poem but I hate ending it and I often never do. It’s the same with the paintings I’ve done in the past few months – I begin really well and dread finishing it. I end up having a huge stack of unfinished paintings, or on the other hand, I have a pile of work really badly finished because I lost my love for it after the focus feature.
In the case of my stories, I get into a really creative mood and write a lot down that reads pretty well – and then once I hit the conflict or the most grand part in my mind, I get bored and very quickly over it and just file it away and never touch it again. Then for the next few days I’ll go back to it, read the good parts over and over again and just regret writing it and getting myself into the frustrating situation where my mind refuses to conclude it.
With my Chinese paintings I HATE coloring them. I usually just leave them in black and white because I’m either too afraid of ruining it with my poor color shading skills, or I like it bland and amateur (ie. too lazy to finish).

Grr! This is an angry bear that is the finished quality of which I aspire to achieve.

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